Coffee Crone: Taming Coffee Blog

December 28 2007

My (very short) Life of Crime

When I was very, very little, I went into McLeans department store with my mother at Christmas time. When she wasn't looking, I took Baby Jesus. I also took a chocolate bar from the neighbourhood store at around that age, but as Baby Jesus didn't leave a tell-tale brown ring around my mouth, I almost got away with it.

I think it was my grandmother who first noticed that Baby Jesus was sitting on the shelf next to Poor Pitiful Pearl and turned me in to my parents.

Now, when I took the chocolate bar, my folks made it into a great moral lesson and I had to apologize to the store owner and pay for the stolen candy from my birthday money. I also had to swear to never, ever take anything that didn't belong to me.

Clearly this did not work. After all, I ended up stealing Baby Jesus.

In this instance, there was no family parade into the store manager's office. I think my family feared the small town newsworthiness of a five year old Jewish girl stealing the saviour. Instead my grandfather, who was known far and wide for his magic tricks, was pushed into sneaking Baby Jesus back into the crèche.

He was successful, and that was the end of my life of crime.

I hear that these days they are equipping some of the Baby Jesus figures with GPS devices. It's probably a good idea. Apparently not everyone who takes them is a sticky fingered little girl.

I wonder if she will get a spanking. I know I did.

posted by taming at 04:05 | link | comments (3)|
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Comments:

#1 28 December 2007 - 06:04

I would never have thought to steal a baby Jesus....
You learned your lesson! Some people never do!

Ladyinthemoon

#2 28 December 2007 - 07:42

Its a good thing they never found out at the border.

rustymadgal

#3 28 December 2007 - 10:26

If you haven't already read it, pick up a copy of Frank McCourt's "Angela and the Baby Jesus," about his mother when she was a little girl and stole the baby. I got it and read it to our feverish and vomiting granddaughter, and she was so engaged with the story she forgot her misery for the night.